One of the pitfalls of grief is self-pity and bitterness. So I tried all sorts of methods to grieve properly. I looked up literature on stages of grief, but none of the information made sense of my despair. I also tried religious ways of dealing with grief such as prayers for the dead. But those did not comfort me. At some point, it was a question of, will I ever get to the root of grieving properly before I end up dead?
Until one day, I found myself grieving in a very different way, a way never mentioned in any of medical literature. I was grieving for my sins. Good grief! That would’ve been the last thing I’d do because I believed I was a good person, trying to live a good life. In fact, I saw myself as the one agrieved by the evil intents of others. Yet, by the grace of God, I was mourning, not because I’ve become a widow, but because I died with Jesus on the cross. And Jesus saved me from the despair of my sins.
So I finally understood that beautitude,
This was not mourning for the dead, but mourning for my own death, for the sinful nature I was born in. And what does such godly sorrow bring?
“Salvation without regret”! Never doubt the power of the living Word of God!